It’s not that I didn’t know I was overweight.
I’ve been overweight since I had my son 23 years ago.
And it’s not that I didn’t know what got me to this point. In particular, I recall 6 days in a row of having rib eye steaks for dinner. And plenty of cocktails. And I found a great brownie recipe.
Yeah, I know how I got this fat.
I just didn’t realize I was THIS overweight.
For years, 170 lbs was my “oh shit” weight. The weight that I would hit and go, “Oh shit. I need to lose weight!”
But for some reason, I let 170 hit and I didn’t stop my bad habits. Then I was 180 and was still eating poorly. And then 183 lbs.
WTF!?!
I don’t think my weight really sunk in until I saw myself when I tried on wedding dresses. From the front it wasn’t so bad, but my fiance took pics of me from the side. I was horrified by how I looked. In my head I was like, “I just can’t look like this for my wedding!!!”
I also realized how close I was getting to 200 lbs. That kinda freaked me out, too.
I think back to why I didn’t realize it. Where was my head? I weigh myself every day, so it’s not like I don’t see the number.
I see myself in the mirror every day. The belly fat hanging down.
But for some reason, none of it was sinking in.
Was it the Spanx-type tank top that I had been wearing that was hiding all my fat rolls under my shirt? Perhaps.
I really can’t explain it, but for some reason, I saw myself every day but I didn’t really see myself. Does that make sense? Probably not. But maybe some of you might relate.
In my head, I was still in a reasonable weight range.
In reality, I had passed the line to obese.
Obese.
That’s such a terrible word to be associated with. It’s unhealthy. It’s unattractive. It’s uncomfortable. It’s just……not a good thing to be.
Last night I took my measurements. 42-38.5-42.5
That’s a long way from the coveted 36-24-36.
There’s a thing called waist-to-hip ratio. Mine is .90. For women, .80 and above is bad. Ideally, I should be in the .6 – .7 range.
But a little over a month ago, my waist was two and a half inches bigger. A whopping 41 inches around.
I still have 14.5 inches to go, but I’ve already achieved 14% of my goal. I’m 32% of the way to my wedding (from the date I originally measured myself) but I wasn’t putting in the best effort I could (skipped workouts and too much cheating on my eating through the holidays). I bet I can do better between now and my wedding day.
Variety Diety 